"If God wants to burn up everything useless in my life, amen to that. But I want to know whether or not this sorrow has an end. Do these longings in my heart for love and purpose mean anything? I say yes. Is my need for God just misplaced longing that has no place to be satisfied? I say no. The body thirsts because it needs water and water exists. The soul longs for purpose because it needs it, and because it exists. And I wouldn't long for God if he didn't exist. I am taking this personally because I am personal. And I don't think that an impersonal God could create humans to be personal. So I'm taking this personally from a personal God.
A sixteenth-century monk wrote a treatise called Dark Night of the Soul. When we first know God, he lavishes us with blessings and signs of his love, the way you do with your children when they're small. But God wants us to grow up. So he removes his blessings. The sense of his presence. And even signs of love. Because he wants us to trust when we can't see, to believe we're loved even if we can't feel it, to walk by faith and not by sight. And maybe he wants me to love him for himself, not for what I can get out of him.
Well, if that's where I am, then okay. I can be here. I'm in my own Dark Night of the Soul. And I'm just waiting for my sun to come up."
I don't really have much to add to that right now. I will say this, "maybe he wants me to love him for himself, not for what I can get out of him." Something to think about...