Thursday, December 10, 2009

these dreams...

I have dreams.

A lot of dreams.

And at this time I'm not really talking about dreams that you have while you are sleeping.
(Though I have a lot of those too.)

And I'm not really talking about daydreams either...
(Though the things of these dreams often appear in my daydreams...)

These are more like things I yearn for. Aspirations. Objectives. Goals.

Some are a little silly.

For instance, I love to sing. I wish I had been brave and tried out for some musicals... what if I had been really good...

And I wish I knew how to dance. I'd like to take a dance class. Maybe I will.

But most of these dreams are really meaningful.

One day, I want to be the kind of mother that my mom is.
I want to marry someone that will be the husband & father that my dad is.
I want to remain close to my amazing sisters. I want our families to be close.

I want to be like some of the woman that I have admired & learned from over the years.
Role models from my childhood like Andy Skidmore and Sheila Jones.
Women that have been there for me throughout some of my most spiritually developmental years: Trish Nason in my senior year of high school, Ann Ledet in my senior year of college, and Christy Johnson & Marcie Miller in these recent years.
Some of my closest friends that are continued inspiration: Sarah Beth, Carie, Laurel, Brittany, Amelia, Annie, Beth, Abbey, Ashley, Marci... I have been blessed with some of the most incredible friends...

God has used each and every one of these individuals to shape me in some specific way. And there are so many more. SO many more. And I am so grateful for the role that each one has played in my life...

I want to live my life in a way that inspires people.
But not because of anything I am...
I want it to all be about He who is in me.

I want God to have full access to me.
I want to passionately seek Him.
And love Him.
And live like Him.

I want Him to be able to touch people,
And love people,
And extend grace
Through me.

I want to be bold.
And listen to this.
I want to be meek.
And for these things to be true of me.
I want to be faithful, as He is faithful.
And I want this to describe my ministry.
I want to abide in Him.
And I want Him in me.

God, this is my prayer. Now I will do as You say. I lay myself down so that You will make me walk as one who is no longer lame. Your Kingdom come, Lord. Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. You are alive in me. You are alive in us. Show the world who You are.


Terry said...

awesome...loved it.